I have never been able to understand why I craved sugar like some people say they crave cocaine. Most of my life I have craved sugar, refined sugar particularly. Cupcake icing, chocolate, ice cream, cookie dough, if it was sweet I wanted it. Standing in the kitchen with a tub of icing and a spoon is something I have done, although not proudly. And I would try to exercise and eat right but I always felt this overhanging cloud of sugar sugar sugar. I finally hit the heaviest I had ever weighed (the same I weighed while pregnant with our youngest) and I went to our doctor.
I told Dr. H, "I don't want to loose weight because I want to feel hot. I want to loose weight because it is hard to do things with my kids and grandkids. And this fatigue is killing me." He nodded and said we would try diet and exercise for six months. Then come back and see him.
So I did. And six months later I made my appointment to go see him again. I knew my weight had not moved much. When the nurse weighed me when I checked in I had gained seven pounds. Uh... Something is wrong. I had been using a free app called My Fitness Pal to track my food and activity. I was on a long streak of daily log ins. I had proof I was working on the issue. (Not that I really needed proof, Dr. H has been our doctor long enough we trust him completely and are absolutely honest with him.)
I was shown to a patient room and I waited. As I waited I stood at the window and looked out at the goings on around the building. It was then Dr. H came in the room. He stepped in and extended his hand to greet me. I turned from the window and he could see my profile. He stopped, midstride, and stood still. He looked surprised. "You're swollen," he said, "Your abdomen is swollen." Yup, it was that noticeable. Tell me about it. And I feel awful.
He looked at my chart, saw the weight gain, and talked to me about the last six months. It was clear to him something more was going on so he said he would run some labs and we would see if there were any clues. "Some" labs... When I entered the lab and handed the phlebotomist my paperwork she exclaimed, "Wow! He never runs this much!" So I rolled up my sleeve and sighed. He definitely ordered quite a few.
A few days later I got a message on their secure patient portal. I know I have mentioned those before and how convenient they are. My labs showed insulin resistance. He wanted me to come in. Insulin resistance? I'm not diabetic. And while I am in healthcare I wasn't really sure what all that meant. I can help adjust someone's sugar levels with dextrose or insulin but I am not well educated in the endocrine system.
What I do know is medication. I went back to see Dr. H and he reviewed my labs with me. He said he wanted to put me on Metformin. I said, "The diabetic medication? You just told me I am nowhere near prediabetes." And I wasn't, for which I was grateful.
He smiled, "We use it for a lot of things. I want you to try it for a few months. See if it helps line your levels out and temper some of your sugar cravings." I began to protest but then thought the better of it. He is the physician. We trust him. He has always had our best interests at heart. And besides, this is what we pay him for. I agreed. I would try it. He warned there could be some gastrointestinal side effects, which I had studied, but said they should subside after the first few weeks.
So, I began the new medicine. True to his word, I did have a sour stomach type side effect for a couple of weeks. Also true to his word, it did subside. Every patient is different, not everyone can tolerate this or any medication. I was thankful I would apparently be able to. And slowly I began to notice I wasn't craving as much sugar. It was a small change at first, but significant considering it was an almost constant in my life. Also slowly the swelling in my abdomen began to go down. Not all at once and not instantly, but it was noticeable. After a few months I looked down and could see my feet before I saw my stomach. It was a big day for me.
This was in no way a diet pill. I still had to do the work. I still used my app to track all my food and activity and make sure I was keeping in line with my goals. What did change was the things I started to crave. I began to crave things like green beans and steak and fresh fajitas. Normally I would crave sweet apples and Chinese food (very high in sugar) and anything loaded with sugar in a plastic package you could get from a vending machine.
I went back for a check up with Dr. H and he was very pleased with my progress. He cautioned me to not get cocky though, I still had to continue to make good food choices and keep up my activity. Repeat labs showed the medication had helped bring the insulin resistance back in line. It wasn't a cure and it wasn't permanent but it was a huge help. And I finally didn't feel so crazy for a life of spinning my wheels in the mud trying to get healthier. You can't outrun an endocrine disorder. You sure can try though.
If you are struggling with issues like these I just wanna hug you. I know how hard it is. To feel like no matter how hard you work you don't ever make any progress. My hope for you is you have or find a doctor that is as invested in your health as you are. And then you find the strength to try again. This road isn't easy. I'm rooting for you.
Be well, y'all
**I am not a doctor and none of this information in this post should be taken for anything other than personal observations. Please seek out advice and treatment from a medical professional.***