We live in a fairly diverse neighborhood. Our youngest has always been a minority in her school. I actually really like that. I love the exposure she gets to other people and cultures. I grew up in a fairly small town. There was not as much diversity. That isn't necessarily the town's fault, just a statement of fact. We have always just tried to teach her to be a good human being, kind and thoughtful and helpful. If you are a parent you know, sometimes you aren't sure it takes until later.
This past winter and spring a family that lives down the hill from us had a young female puppy that kept getting out. She was very energetic and loved to run. She took to running up our hill and running into people's yards and even at people on our street walking. She wasn't mean, she wanted to play, but when you don't know the dog or aren't well acquainted with dog behaviors it can be hard to recognize that. So people were scared. This pup, named Payasa, "clown" in Spanish, quickly learned where our pups lived. She began to run up to our fence and run with them. In her excitement she even began running to our front windows and jumping on them to attempt to play with our boys. While we felt badly for her not being able to play as much as she obviously needed they didn't know each other. We couldn't risk just letting our boys loose.
And so we tried our best to keep our boys calm when she came up our hill. We also hoped her owners would somehow work something out better for her situation.
As we began to watch more, we saw when Payasa got out it was always the same teenage girl coming to get her back. This girl looked to be about the age of our youngest, high school age. We later learned they had attended the same middle school and ridden the same bus. Their middle school was large so they had not known each other well, but they were acquainted.
This girl loved Payasa very much. She also had younger brothers that were often responsible for letting her out. She would tell us that when we were outside and Payasa had gotten loose. They did not have a fence so when she got out, she took off. Our boys have gotten out on more than one occasion. Dogs do that. It happens. They are big boys and love to run. Rico is usually the more guilty party. He is a mountain cur, a farm dog, a hunting dog, running and stretching his legs is instinct for him and most pups. Jax just happens to be a better listener and will return home faster than Rico will.
One night Payasa got out and came to our fence line. Our boys were outside and Rico was not happy. They were trying to get at each other through the fence. Had there been no fence they may have wrestled and played. But there was a fence and they weren't happy about it. Being a mountain cur, Rico is also very protective of us and our home. He didn't know Payasa, not really. He did know she didn't belong near our fence. My husband was able to calm Rico down and get him inside.
After he did, we started talking to the girl. I don't know about your neighborhood but we don't know much about our neighbors. We want to, but life just doesn't seem to be set up that way anymore. We know our immediate neighbors to either side of us and the names of some near us but that's it. It was a mild night and Payasa's mom began talking. She apologized for Payasa profusely. Said she had tried to rehome her but the person that took her didn't treat her well at all so she took her back. My heart ached when I heard that. Rico was abused as well. She knew Payasa needed a better place for her energy but she was a teenager so her options were limited.
While we talked Payasa began to smile. We began to talk to her and pet her through our fence. She was such a sweetie. She even gave us kisses. Our youngest asked if she could go to the other side of the fence to pet her. I didn't see why not. The girls knew each other anyway. When our youngest got over there Payasa melted into her arms, then knocked her over with kisses. Such a sweetie.
The young girl looked at me and said, "Did you know she <referring to our youngest> was one of the only people that was nice to me in middle school?"
No... No I didn't know that. And I told her so.
The girl went on to tell us a little about her home. She did not have the best home life. Her mother struggled with drug addiction off and on but was doing okay at the moment. She was mainly the one responsible for her brothers, and only a kid herself. She couldn't move in with her dad because it would mean leaving them behind. She also struggled with her own mental health, depression mostly.
"So yeah," she said, "I really appreciate you being so nice to me in middle school. Most people weren't."
Tears pricked my eyes. For this girl and for the gratefulness I was feeling that our youngest had been a light in the darkness for her. I made sure the young girl knew how to contact us if she ever needed another adult and left the girls out there to continue chatting. I came inside and just sat... So proud of our youngest and the human she was becoming. She had never told me about being nice to this girl or anyone really, just the typical "school was fine" answers you get from a kid. Sometimes I'm not sure about this whole parenting thing. There is no manual. We are all building the plane while we're flying it. And sometimes, things happen that tell you you might not be doing so bad.
Has there been someone that was a light in the darkness for you? Has there been a time when you felt maybe you aren't doing so bad? Tell me about it! I love these stories!
Be well, y'all. Love your neighbor.